This was far from an easy realization, since I believe in the concept of free-range learning wholeheartedly. In fact, I daresay it's impossible to get through life without unschooling whether a person means to or not. That said, unschooling was not the answer for us--at least, not in the way we were doing it.
We had reverted to unschooling after a stressful charter program experience prompted us to withdraw from the program. Bri was allowed to self-select activities, although I frequently "strewed" items of potential interest as well as suggestions. As a deschooling method, this worked wonders. She made huge gains in the reading and spelling she'd struggled with, and she regained some of the confidence lost when charter requirements made her feel "dumb". After a while, however, I found our unschooling approach seemed to be causing more problems than it solved.
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| Clutter creates mental chaos for us! |
After taking stock of the steadily mounting pile of issues, I put the brakes on this runaway train. One of the biggest reasons I homeschool is to have the freedom to tailor learning experiences to the child. If something isn't working, it's time for a change--so I did some soul searching. Some kids can skip happily through day after day of unplanned spontaneity. Bri, on the other hand, has drilled us since she could talk for details on what the day/week/year's schedule holds. Other kids function just fine with a messy room. Clutter in Bri's room (or the house) makes a big impact on her focus and state of mind.
It occurred to me that a child whose very nature is to seek order and a consistent schedule may not be the best candidate for a "whatever the winds may bring" approach to life and learning. She thrives best on structure, and lots of it. So that's what I gave her. In fairness, I didn't just drop unschooling like a hot potato and run screaming into traditional academia. We put pieces back together a step at a time. Her room was reassembled into a functional space. "Bedtime" became more than an idle concept. A set time for learning was reestablished, and we went back to using workboxes--first one or two a day, then more. And a big shift happened in terms of playmates and unsupervised time.
I won't say she was delighted to embrace this global change. However, she was thrilled to get her room back shipshape, and I saw the marked relief that seemed to follow having a schedule to rely on. In the months since, things have gotten back on track, enough to know that for now, we're on the best path for us.
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| Our unschooling fun is staying! |
I'm looking forward to a productive year, but the thing I most want to remember is that as a homeschooling parent, I want to look for signs that a better way to learn is needed, preferably before the yarn ball unravels.
